Mental Scars
by MikaMckeena
Summary: One shots of the troubles of one white haired captain in the real world. Also, wrote for windlily for xmas
1. Porn

Mental Scars

Happy X-mas Wind :P

Title: Hitsugaya finds Porn

words: 856

People: Hitsugaya, Matsumoto, background Renji

type: Humor

How was it he kept on getting stuck with all the shopping the last few days? It seemed Fate was once more having a humorous time with the Captain of the Tenth Division. Scowling at the plastic bags in his hands cutting of the circulation to his finger tips, every curse Hitsugaya had ever learned was now on replay in his mind.

Now not all this strife could be placed with one of the people he was technical living off; Orihime Inoue had come down with a fall cold with the sudden change in the weather from last week. She had tried to keep up the bright facade she kept not to worry her "roommates". Yet the poor soul had succumbed to the fever beating her body. He being the reportedly one of the three had sent the poor girl to bed after a bowl of soul and warm tea. The sight had been worth a few playful smiles from the Lieutenant Matsumoto at seeing the young captain act in a fatherly way to the teenage human.

"Someday I will end up regretting something I did out of being nice.." his thoughts along with out he had gotten this chore once more. Matsumoto had been given the duty of shopping for this week, yet their cells had picked up the presence of a hollow just a block away. Seeing her golden path out of the chore, the busting woman had popped out of her gigia like a spring and had shot of to kill the mean beastly! Leaving one middle school looking captain holding the shopping list, his voice following after her heels like a bat out of hell." Maatsumotooo!"

Now here he was doing the shopping, to catch up in his mind about the nasty things he might do the the older woman once he got back or tracked down her sorry ass once more for skipping out on work. Then it happened, he clashed into a warm wall of a body, falling back on his small rump with a off. The bags bouncing to crash on the earth next to one more then their should be. Rubbing his crown of silver hair, a deep voice broke his mid curse. "Captain Hitsugaya?"

One such voice belong to Renji, one of the Shinigami that come to the earth with him a few short weeks ago. He was standing over the boy genius, his hand out stretched to help him up from the ground. Taking the larger one, he was lifted of the ground. Dangling in the air by the strength of the full grown man. Glaring at the lieutenant of the sixth, the air chilled around the pair of Shinigami. Seeing the danger of the situation, Renji set the Captain back to the earth. "Sorry about that Captain.." he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, grinning in hoping not to be frozen to that spot.

"It was my fault Abarai, I wasn't watching were I was going." Hitsugaya grouchy answered, picking up the white bags and leaving Renji's for him to grab. "Half a good night."

He left it like that, not really wanting to worsen his mood right now. Being picked up like that had about nuked his pride enough for one day. Heading straight to the apartment with out much haste in wasted any more time or even run ins with his luck right now. No one was there to greet him with hyper and jovial voices like always. In many ways he was grateful for the silent that followed his welcome for once. Setting down the bags on the floor in the kitchen, a letter was picked up on his hand..

Captain

I took Inoue to the doctor her cough was getting worse and she kept on saying there was a giant dancing carrot trying to take over the world. I'll give you call on how things are going. Stay out of trouble and be a good boy while we are away.

Love

Matsumoto

Scowling a bit more softly, he knew the human girl would be safe with the woman at least on these matters. Reaching to put away the bags, his hands felt a smooth surface and not the what he might think it was..Reaching into the bag and pulling it up. It was a type of magazine, a woman in a silk apron with nothing else sucking something that looked not very right to his teal eyes. Hitsugaya's eyes double in size if that might even be possible by human measures, the thing opened...A tall blond woman open into a center fold most young males put for hidden uses for their..needs. His mouth opened and closed much like a fish's would. This very Naked looking woman was winking, spread open to all the world to see...with very exuding detail.

Hitsugaya had ended up getting Renji's porn while half way cross town, one very red headed 2ed was wandering why he had eggs and not his Busting Beanies...


	2. Panties

Title: Hitsugaya finds Panties

words: 425

People: Hitsugaya, Matsumoto

type:Humor

"Damn that Matsumoto , leaving me to pick up the mess." a young boy stood, his hands on the narrow hips. Face placed in a scowl that would put anyone to shame at the mess of the apartment they were staying by one Inoue Orihime. He felt bad about seeing this place in such a state. Not that he would tell anyone about it.

Cans of food, papers and dirty landary covered the floor. A few beer cans were in the pile. His scowled deepen more if they was possible by the young captain. Signing, once more. It was clean up time again, oh how he was going to make her pay for this again. Paper work and no Sake would kill her will to fight in his Lieutenant for a few days to say the least. Then it start all over again like it had for so many years with the woman,

"How she made it to being a Lieutenant is pass me." Hitsugaya thought, grabbing the papers and placing them into one of the bags he was lining up again. Throwing what ever cloths into a corner. Wrinkling his nose at the mold in few of the papers and glasses. How could anyone live in such a state! He would weather live with Aizen then with this women ever again!

Most of the trash took him the rest of the day. Fighting Hollows would be a vacation after all this work and cleaning about the small rooms. With out thinking about it, he sneezed into a cloth he was holding from the dust. Wrinkling his nose at the burning in his nose again. Then paused, Hitsugaya looked at what was in his hand. It felt like silk and was a bright pink in color. Panties. Matsumoto's panties to say.

His world crumbled in a instant. He had just sneezed into his Lieutenant's panties. Yet at the same that same Lieutenant was opening the door. After killing so many hollows today, a good beer sounded nice to relax. She didn't expect to see her captain holding her pink panties with a beat red face to match almost in shade.

"Captain? Why are holding my underwear?" her voice broke the spell of the pink panties over the captain.

Hitsugaya did the one thing a boy his age might do if normal. Drop the things and run like hell. Shooting out the door with a flash step, a small trail of dust his only mark on the world. Leaving a very confused Matsumoto blinking.


	3. Bra

Hitsugaya and the Bra...

Words:584

People: Hitsugaya, Matsumoto, and Inoue

Once more, the placed was trashed by one Matsumoto, Who was at this moment on more shopping spare with their room mate Inoue to kill some time before dinner had to be made. Which is one very grumpy middle school looking boy was left to clean up the trash of his lieutenant. Oh he had done about everything under the sun to break this woman. Hide her sake...she always found it some how, Bane her from drinking at all...she had found a way to hide it in her tea, cover her shifts with hours of paper work..she had the other seats do it. damn males and her poker luck. The woman was like a cat with way too many life's and lucks on her side. Was she his punishment for some thing he had done in a life time from the gods (if there were any).

Grumping under his breath, he went to picking up the trash. "How can one person do this much damage in a day?"

Maybe she was one of things nature could not explain in the sense of normal or a new type of disaster waiting to happen and hit the world all at once like a nuke? Did it really matter any more trying to figure out what she was. "Yuck..." a bag stuck to his hand from something sticky on the plastic. Shaking the damn thing off, he blushed a bit at sounding like a child for a moment. SHE would have hugged him just making such a sound from his lips. Shuddering, the idea of being forced once more into this..mounds once more...Hitsugaya went back to picking the trash once more.

Then he felt something odd sticking to his hand again. Scowling deeper that it might freeze on his face, he yanked his hand up. Yet the scowl dropped like glass shattering on a high note. A lacy, pink, double D bra was glued to his small hand. Everything stopped in his body and mind...just the garment sticking to his hand filled his mind...

A bra...

A very big sized Bra...

Matsumoto's bra...

Dryly sallowing, his other reached for the thing...it was soft...silky to his touch. A wave of something new hit his body at this time. Ones of those wanders every boy gets with once in his life time...pervert thoughts...

Images of her in this thing..matching panties, the mounds moving in time to saying his name from those red lips...His world was redefined in that one moment. Then his other mind pushed the other out, the mind of the captain and not the young teenage boy refusing to have his moment! Hitsugaya had a inner war happening to his mind, the calm vs the prev! Which would one in this epic battle of wills? Then the sounds of feminine voices set his world back to this one...The girls were back. As the door opened, he did one thing so not to be caught with this...bra. Shove his hand to his back pocket!

"Hi Captain! We brought some pizza to eat tonight!" Mastsumo's very chipper nature was shared with the other girl. Taking this golden gate, Hitsugaya rushed out his words" I'll go grab some drinks!" Shoving past the pair of busting women.

Blinking, a puzzled expression hit the older womans face. "Why does the captain have my bra hanging out his back pocket?"


	4. Sex Ed

(this might be a little dirty for some people)

Title: Hitsugaya and Sex ED

words: 710

People: Hitsugaya, and other things

type: Humor

Once more he was being putting into a situation the other normal captains would not be or forced into, due to they were older then him. Yet it he that been chosen to come to the living world and help Ichigo in the matter of the Winter War about to break on them in just a few months from this moment. Yet Hitsugaya would weather face Azien on this spot, with his full army behind him then have to face the next hour of his life in school. Or what it said on the paper he must attend after the bell...

SEX ED: ROOM 124 AT 3:30

ALL Male STUDENTS OF THE FRESHMEN YEAR THAT DID NOT ATTEND IN MIDDLE SCHOOL MUST COME TO THIS CLASS.

Shuddering, his face was covered by the whole of his hands, this could not be happening to him of all people! Did the gods hate him? Was fate so against him having one easy day at least once in his whole of life? (or after life?) Its not like he didn't know what sex was after being alive so long. Hell he may look like 13 year old in body, mind he was far from that point..

"I hate my life..." it was the only words he could mutter into his hands at this time...With the bell sounding its death ring, Hitsugaya moaned into his palms and pulled his body up. Dragging his feel behind his body, the aura of the young captain made many clear a path in the halls for him to pass. A few felt the warmth leave their skin as he passed...

A few of the seats were filled with other students, many sharing the look he now had on his face. His eye brow twitching, the captain of he tenth slumped into the back of the room. No one came into the room of doom, his living hell...The teacher was a mousy looking man, balding and coffee stained blazer in a dark brown. Setting down a bag of things, he coughed at the few students to claim his voice and wrote on the bored: Mr. Sam.

"Class...I know you don't want to be here. But its important for you to have a healthy view point on sex and what is happening to your body. These urges you have are normal when you look at a young female." Mr. Sam had a low cut voice, raising and falling like a drowning blow horn." This class will help you to understand these things for the next week..."

Did his reality just break? Or was it he sound of his mind cracking finally? Driven insane by this just one moment? The man kept raveling on about a healthy sex drive...then he took it out...that thing...to show them something.

"This is correct in what you are thinking from your face Mr. Toushiro. This is a fake penis, or as you know a vibrators. A sex toy used by some females..to release their own urges as many of you in private..." He let it hang in the air, the few students eyes wiring a little. Hitsugaya felt his mouth open and drop to the desk almost. "This can not be happening to me!"

"I will show you to put on a condom the right way, its good to use protection for both you and your partner when both are an adult." Mr Sam didn't seem to loose a beat now, putting on the looks of the students on mute for the time being.

Hitsugaya had enough of this, grabbing the soul candy and popping out the fake body. "Stay here till the bell rings!" Not waiting anymore, he ran off. Leaving the fake soul to answer a stream of questions after his break.

"What Sex?"

"Can whip cream be used as a lub?"

"Thats boobs for? To hide things in the crack of them?"

"Does a condom also double as a water balloon?"

"Can a guy hook up with a guy?"

"Whats the best pose to use if it is a guy?"

"Am I a Shotacon? Can I be one when I get older?"


	5. Rubber

Title: Hitsugaya and the Rubber Duck

words: 400

People: Hitsugaya, Matsumoto and a duck

type:Humor

Good, they gone once more for a day of "feminine bounding" as Matsumoto had put it to the captain before once more side stepping her cleaning for the week and leaving it to the young captain to fill in her place for the duty to be done. Smiling in a foxiness like way most like a former captain. Hitsugaya has planned this out to the T, knowing how his 2ed would act if given a chore of some kind. Locking the door with a click of the lock, he walked over to the bath room.

Turning the water to a luke setting of warm, he hated hot baths. Grabbing the pink bottle of "Ms. Shiny" bubbles, the youth let the pink liquid slip into the stream of water. He had been looking to this for a week, planning and waiting for the chance to alone...if anyone ever found out at all..no they never find out...Signing in compensation of his plan. The cloths feel to the floor as he slipped his lean body into the flurry of bubbles as they were born from the force of the water.

It was a moment of heaven to his skin, the cleanliness washing over his whole being. Just one thing was missing to make this moment all the more perfect. Reaching over the side, his skin a bit flushed from the heat to take on a pinkish tone. Pulling from under the shower curtain was small rubber white duck..its wide blue eyes in a smile in the bill. Squeaking it a bit, the sound of a high quack hit the room. Hitsugaya had found his idea of heaven, a tube full of bubbles and a rubber duck to play with a alone..

Unknown to him, two females peeked in the high window. A smile of awe coming from both of them at the sheer cuteness of the picture of the Tenth Captain. Seems the little dragon did have a childish a bit when he come off tiring to be so stiff and calm with anyone else. Matsumoto was also smiling a bit in a evil kinda way. Looking down at the images she had taken with her cell phone...black mail was always a good thing to use when getting out of doing paper work!


End file.
